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Today is my DH birthday. Unfortunately I have been
sick and my daughter also. DH stepdaughter. She
originally was going to visit and we were going to
have a small celebration. Now his daughter calls from Israel and asks if he had a cake not knowing
what was happening. She hung up before I could
tell her. I feel like every time his family calls they
just cause more problems for me. Remember I blocked the annoying brother. And then they ask him if he remembers certain people. Isn't that wrong? Would love input.

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Is the problem that she asked him if he had a cake and he got upset? Really, if she only talks to him how is she going to know you all have been sick?

If she was talking to you, then don't worry about it. She is far away. Clueless on what goes on daily for you.
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I don't really see a problem here. I think people long distance don't know what to say so they just blurt out silliness like "So what kind of CAKE does he have". Clearly this was the "obligatory birthday call" in which they haven't a bloody clue who he is any more or what to say. And honestly, the call is off their to do list for today and on they go. It is just a family separated not by lots of miles, but by continents. They haven't a clue. The important family you have is right there. What do you want to bet you don't have to deal with the other family from the other continent until Christmas.

Not worth even thinking about. Your plate is full enough. You never cared for them, in all likelihood and you never will. And you don't HAVE to.
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Cheeky79 Sep 2023
Holidays are no longer an issue because she became an orthodox Jew when she got married.
My husband was against it but there is nothing you
can do about it. That is their life now. We celebrate
Christmas. He never had a close relationship with
the grandchildren unfortunately. That is why he
became so close to my one and only grandchild
that he adores and she adores her Papa. I appreciate your input. Makes so much sense. It is
water under the bridge now.
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You could give the family the answers they want to hear. They’re not going to know the truth.

”Yes, we had cake and strawberry ice cream with sprinkles.” “Sure, we went for a walk outside. He enjoyed it.”

It seems kind of sneaky, but so what? When you’re dealing with dunces, you need to protect yourself.
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Cheeky79 Sep 2023
That is a good answer. I like it. Appreciate you.
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Cheeky (((hugs))).

You don't need to explain yourself to anyone.

Did the conversation make DH feel bad, or just you?

Some things we just have to let go.
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Cheeky79 Sep 2023
You're right. I think I'm driving myself crazy. He will
forget about it by tomorrow. Thanks.
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