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My dad, 87 years old, has had some worsening of his inguinal hernia. I mean really worsening. He can only wear sweatpants, no underwear. This thing is maybe halfway down his thigh. He doesn't want to see his doctor for anything at all. He's pretending this doesn't exist, especially to his daughter (me) but I want to know what suggestions to make to him. He doesn't care that I know this can be dangerous. Is anyone here dealing with this sort of thing? What do you suggest for clothes? How do you maintain your dignity with this terrible appearance?

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UPDATE: His cardiologist, the only doctor he seems to respect, ordered him to see his primary care doctor. It seems now we're fighting kidney failure. Anyway, now I have some backing. It's not just me saying he should go to his regular doctor. I may have to nag him into making this appointment, til he hates me. Which he would certainly do if I just made him an appointment myself. He can't give up control until he is dead, I guess.
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Just looked online and there are girdles for this. Something you could ask the doctor.
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By all means, have him see a doctor. It is dangerous if it becomes strangulated. The way I understand it, many people simply live with it. I don't think there is anyway to manage it other than surgery. The clothing options don't appear to work. Is it worth the risk of surgery at his age? That's something that your dad and his doctor need to discuss. I hear many times at that age, it's simply monitor. If your dad decides on surgery, he should look into getting it done in Canada. Places there still take the time to weave the existing muscle to cover the opening. In the US, we seem to have abandoned that to save money and use a mesh implant. Unfortunately, there are side effects to the mesh like chronic pain.

As usual, these are simply the ramblings of a layman.
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Reeta14 Feb 2019
I guess I can only suggest he go to the doctor and that's it. He is on coumadin and I think the doc will say to monitor. Dad does not travel any longer, so Canada is out of the question, but it's good to know this option exists. Thanks for your ramblings! :-)
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I just read about this. This is serious. Small ones can be controlled but ur Dads seems worse. The blood supply could be cut off. Killing that part of the intestine. Infection could set in. I would get him to a doctor or ER.
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Reeta14 Feb 2019
Thanks, I did read about this too. He is a tough customer to talk into going to a doctor. It's always "I'm alright." "It's fine." This is another instance when if this all goes very badly I'll guilt myself about it, when actually he is making a choice. And also he's a bad candidate for surgery. So I check in every day to see how he is. Fingers crossed that he'll agree to go.
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