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I am trying to find additional money to help pay for my brother's assisted living bills. He has vascular dementia and Alzheimer's Disease. He also has Major Depressive Disorder. He is medically eligible for Medicaid, but I would have to move him to the skilled nursing portion of his care facility to apply for Medicaid. He would have to move out of his comfortable room into the hospital ward-like beds of skilled care. His clinical depression is eased somewhat by the pleasant surroundings of his assisted living room. If he moves to the clinic-like skilled nursing section, I'm concerned that his depression would increase and his decline from his dementia would only get worse. I am his financial POA, and I need an additional $1,600 a month added to his social security and pension to keep him in his assisted living room. I have been dipping into his savings to pay the current bills, but his money will soon run out. I am 70 years old and retired with health problems of my own and have no assets I can use to pay my brother's bills. I am considering using GoFundMe to do fundraising for my brother. Has anyone gone this route? Any suggestions or opinions? Thanks very much.

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I would consult with a Medicaid Planner for his state. FYI in addition to having to financially qualify he also has to medically qualify for LTC, and in my experience "just" having dementia doesn't require LTC but rather MC. You don't get to make that LTC decision unless the facility is willing to give that assessment just to keep him there. Every state has different rules about Medicaid and that's why you need to talk to a professional who knows your state's rules inside and out. Then depending on what you find out, it may be helpful to consult an elder law attorney.

As far as GoFundMe... I don't know but I personally wouldn't contribute to such a fund since there are hundreds of thousands of people in your brother's exact shoes. That's a lot of money to have to raise every month, month after month, and that's if he doesn't need MC which will be even more expensive.
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The reality is most GoFundMe campaigns never reach their goal. In fact, over 90% never get anywhere near the funding they are trying to source. Success is very dependent on having a strong social media presence and a wide circle of "friends". It would be even more difficult to have a reoccurring campaign as you would either need to raise a significant amount upfront or try and drive reoccurring campaigns. I personally wouldn't count on this as a source of funds and either look at other options or accept your brother will need to move.
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A GoFundMe is used for a one time donation for those in need. It is not set up for continuous monthly donations. There are assisted living places that do accept Medicaid, but they are far and few between. The GoFundMe donations would eliminate your brother to be eligible for Medicaid. Those donations are considered income by Medicaid eligibility. In other words you cannot use GoFundMe and Medicaid together. Medicaid does limit the choices for your brother, but as long as he is well cared for, you have to accept the skilled nursing facility.
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Medicaid will cover a SNF, why exactly do you need to a GoFundMe?
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Relying on a GoFundMe campaign is akin to hoping to hit the lottery jackpot. To have any hope of raising a significant amount you'd need a wide reach and a compelling story, so that means a lot of publicity, a large network of supportive family and friends, and a situation that demonstrates true catastrophic need that no other funding source can help.

Unfortunately, not using Medicaid because you don't want to move your brother to skilled nursing isn't going to fly. Taxpayers will already pay for his care with Medicaid, yet you're asking for even more.

It won't work.
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Go fund me won’t sustain financial care.

I would start searching for a new facility if your unhappy with the current one. I suggest finding a care placement specialist who knows the area. I wouldn’t have found where my mom is currently without mine. Carepatrol is a franchise , that I used. Maybe they are in your area ?? Or one similar. My agent met me at the facility, for tour and talking with the coordinator. Agent gets paid by the Facility for placement, not by you. I helped place my mom in another city like this, along with my in laws, and my mother a second time. Invaluable resource. My agent knows the cost, availability, if the place fits you etc.

good luck with your changes …
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Myownlife Mar 2022
Thank you so much for this info. They are in my area, so will file that info. for when the time comes.
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GoFundMe generally reaches out to known friends via social media for one time catastrophic expenses. I have never heard of it consistently raising this kind of funds for any reason, no matter how good the cause.
It is admirable you are trying so hard to provide for your brother; I had a much loved brother of my own, who ended his days in ALF and was much comforted by being able to have his last remaining treasures and his own furniture around him, and I can imagine how much your heart hurts for your brother. I am so sorry.
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Cover99 Mar 2022
George Floyd's campaign raised 13 Million
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Contact a care placement specialist. They can get you on the right track. Personally, if he has dementia, he needs to be in memory care. My mom is in memory care, She has her own private room and Medicaid covers it 100%
Go fund me is for people who need a one time help, not a crutch for ongoing help. Your brother would need ongoing. Plus, medicaid would count go fund me as income and it would be taxable. You'd be doing him a dis service. There are anti depressants his Dr. could prescribe if he can't have a room by himself. The memory care places I checked out for mom all have private rooms. Find a memory care facility first so medicaid doesn't try placing him first. You've got a better chance of getting what you want. Go fund me is not for your circumstance.
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KPWCSC Mar 2022
Flowerhouse1952. I thought memory care is considered assisted living and not covered by Medicaid? Is your mom getting memory care within a skilled nursing facility? Or maybe this varies by state?
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If you put your request on go fund me, you’d have to put hour name on it thus advertising your biz to the whole world with little likelihood of success.

Think of Medicaid as akin to a big urban public school system. Some schools are stellar but most are on a gradient. Find out, perhaps by even asking his al, what facilities they prefer to work with for transfers, that’ll probably be the better ones.
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If he is running out of money your only choice is placing him in LTC.
If he has enough for one or months in a nice LTC, get him placed. Then apply for Medicaid. If the facility helps you with the process, keep on top of it. In my State you only have 90 days to spend down and get info needed to the caseworker. With my Mom I started the application process in April. She paid 2 months privately for May and June. I confirmed in June with the caseworker, that Mom was spent down and he had all info needed. Medicaid started July 1st.

Me personally, I do not do GoFundMe. And as said, they are not set up for continued income.
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Thanks to all who responded with helpful information and comments.
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If you want to give it a shot, go ahead. It helps if you can also get some kind of media coverage to describe your plight.
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Nokonoko Mar 2022
You mean the plight of many families that are forced to care for an elderly position? The story is not unique or compelling, and funding options exists it is called Medicaid. They are essentially saying their LO is too good for Medicaid and is entitled to “better” quality facility.

That is really going to go over well when they try to spin their story to gain sympathy. Might have a shot if say their LO was 40 or something.
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I don’t think that’s the answer there are millions of people in the same situation you will need to look at placing him in a more financially affordable place
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God bless you, but now you MUST think of saving that money for YOUR future. He may have to accept a change in living situation and I know that will be tough, but it may have to be.
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LMAO george floyd
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I would start looking for another place that would be suited for him and takes Medicaid after so long of self paying.
many familes
are in the same boat, start looking now and ask the financial questions.
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If he qualifies for Medicaid you need to move him into a nursing home. My elder attorney advised me to be sure I can self pay several months at a nursing home. That way you can choose the NH. Otherwise if he has no money left but his SS ...good luck in even getting him into one. I took his advise and when my mom only had about $27000 I place her in a NH I was referred to by her Hospice nurse . that paid for 3 months. She then was able to stay there while she was Medicaid pending. I applied for Medicaid when she only had $5000 left. It took Medicaid 5.5 months to approve. She was just approved this past week. They will go back to 11-11-21 and back pay the facility. I know this isn't the ideal decision for you. But sometimes you just have to do what is financially in yours and his best interest. Good luck.❤
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How blessed your brother is to have you!
Isn’t it crazy how our society works?! If only you could find an additional $1600 per month, your brother could continue to live in a nice memory care unit. The alternative is to move him to a sterile (hopefully) nursing home and apply for Medicaid to the tune of well over $100,000 per year. This is such a huge struggle that many caregivers face. The availability of supplemental funds to individuals who pay out of pocket for memory care would save taxpayers a lot of money and free up nursing home beds to those who truly require that level of care.

I am wondering if you have contacted your county dept. on aging. In many states, there are some memory care facilities that accept Medicaid. However, there aren’t many. You may want to reach out to find out about other options or even see if there are memory care facilities that are a bit cheaper than your brother’s current placement. Good luck to you!
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A nice try, but why would expect other people to pay for your brother's care when other people need their money for their own and their own family's care?
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My brother just passed in a skilled nursing center. He was covered by medicaid which left a small allowance $30, from his social security check that went to facility. With multiple childhood disabilities, polio, etc., it took months to be approved after I cashed his life policy, prepaid his funeral, and spent down the funds in bank. If your brother has more than $2,000 total in assets, bank, real estate, whole life insurance, etc., he will not qualify for Medicaid. They can look at records years back. From what you describe, he will not be going home. With alzhimers, depression and dementia, its questionable he can appreciate (or cares about) the difference in surroundings. His assets should be liquidated and utilized for the level of care you think he should have. Then apply for Medicaid when his asset level meets the requirement. My brother had no mental impairment, and I did the best I could with what we had to make him as comfortable as possible, as his multi conditions made bringing him home impossible. My other siblings did not offer assistance. Starting a "Go Fund me" for someone with available fund sources, is improper.
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leese2020 Mar 2022
Agreed.
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In our area, as of a couple of years ago, there were no Medicaid only ALF's but there were Medicare / Medicaid ALF's. Not sure about Memory Care. And honestly, I don't know why they would be ok with Medicare / Medicaid, as Medicare does not pay for LTC. Would appreciate anyone who knows, explaining this. It may also help the OP.
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There's no way you could get enough to make a dent in the kind of on-going, long-term care he will need. Besides that, Go Fund Me has a reputation for blocking the account so the recipient can't get access to the money if they, for any number of reasons, deem the recipients unworthy. They are NOT a non-profit organization. I will never use them, or contribute to another Go Fund Me account again.
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GiveSendGo is far better than GoFundMe! But that would just be for your immediate need.

I'm not sure where you are from, but many states have funding available to help the disabled and elderly. The best program we have in this area is called IRIS.

They allow the person or trusted family member to direct their own care. They can stay in charge. In fact they can stay in their own home if they want and IRIS will help pay for the care he wants to bring in. But whatever his needs are and where ever he chooses to go they can help financially. They will help pay for caregivers and also things he needs that are not already covered by his insurance.

I pray for you and your brother to find the best and for God to heal you both of whatever problems you may now have. God Bless You!
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PeggySue2020 Mar 2022
I have tried to find this iris you have posted about several times. How about a link.
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Sounds like your brother will qualify for Medicaid! You are not financially responsible for another adult.

YOU SAID "He is medically eligible for Medicaid, but I would have to move him to the skilled nursing portion of his care facility to apply for Medicaid."

NOW: Ask the facility to place him or get a conservator.
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Look into care homes, they will sometimes be covered by Medicaid.
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svking- If you do decide to use GoFundMe to find money for your brother, let us know how it goes.

Where I live, there are a lot of panhandlers standing at the center dividers where people wait to make a left turn. If they get one person to give them $1 every traffic light cycle, they probably get $20/hr. So, potentially they can make $100 or more per day, or $3000/month. No wonder they don't want to work.

I also have seen a few women pushing their little kids in strollers, walking up to people in parking lots and asking for money.

And there are a few normal/not homeless people carrying big poster boards with pictures of a sick child and a message saying the kid has cancer and they need money, etc. These people will walk right into the street where cars are waiting at red lights and shove their signs in front of the drivers to ask for money. Whether they actually have a sick kid with cancer, who knows. But these people get a lot of money, $5 or $10 from each donor vs $1 that panhandlers get.

At 70 y.o., svking, I don't recommend you try any of the above.
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DO NOT use Gofundme, b/c they are judge & jury to decide who gets the donated money. If they decide, for whatever reason, that your brother 'should not' get whatever funds are donated in his name, then he won't get them. GFM should be shut down entirely b/c they have their own agenda which should not be the way business is conducted on their part, ever, under any circumstances. Here is a list of alternative sites to use:

Fundly.
Bonfire.
Double the Donation.
DonateKindly.
Kickstarter.
IndieGogo.
Classy.
Kickstarter.

I would be very surprised if friends would continue to donate $1600 a month to keep your brother living where he's at indefinitely. Most people have it in them to donate once or twice, and that's it. To think you can keep him there month after month seems like a pipe dream, in my opinion, but it may be worth a try. Don't be surprised if people don't donate to the 'cause', however. Times are very hard right now & most of us can't even afford our OWN lives, never mind to fund someone else's when Medicaid IS an option.

Good luck
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Using GoFundMe will not provide a consistent income to cover his bills. Please work with social services or case management to get your brother the care he needs under Medicare/Medicaid.
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Any chance your brother was a veteran during a war?? If so, look into Aid and Attendance thru the VA. It would provide enough funds to keep him at his current facility
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Katefalc Apr 2022
VA aid and attendance is determined by his income and asset amounts. My husband is in a VA medical center now and he’s a viet nam era veteran. We have too much in assets for aid and attendance but we are Medicaid pending
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Besides being taxable, wouldn't a GoFundMe or similar program interfere with your brother's eligiblity for Medicaid if he needs it? Realistically, you are likely to cover a month or two but not more with solicited donations. I have been asked to contribute to community members in financial trouble. I am happy to help the first time, less so when it happens repeatedly. Meaning you will also lose friends if you go this route.
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